Breast Cancer 4th Time - Update & Some Results!

Finally an update. Sorry it's been so long, but better late than never.

I completed 10 days of radiation on Friday, May 3rd. Thank goodness I don't have claustrophobia. You are held down with a tight mask on your face and is strapped to the table. Sometimes you feel like you can barely breathe, but you take slow and steady breaths and get through it. I got to ring the radiation bell and it was an exciting day at MD Anderson Cancer Center.

I started chemotherapy at Ironwood Cancer Center on May 8th. I get chemo via infusion every 3 weeks. It knocks me out pretty hard. For the first week I feel like a zombie and I get really bad muscle aches, but then the muscle aches ease up and I start gaining my strength back before my next chemo. I sleep 10-12 hours a night and then usually require a nap, but I am so grateful that I have the ability to do so. My co-workers are sacrificing by allowing me to be off work to focus on getting better and they are even donating the hours to cover my time off. Sometimes I have to pinch myself that I am so incredibly blessed and surrounded by such caring and loving people.

Right before we left to Hawaii my neighbor/friend asked me if she could give her friend a tour of our house if she was interested. She knew we were eventually going to list the house after we did some work on it. We got home from Hawaii to a text message from my friend saying they loved the house and they want to put in an offer! They put in an offer and before we knew it we were moving out! Seriously such a miracle and huge blessing from my Heavenly Father. It wasn't just coincidence. I know there was some divine intervention and I really believe my Grandma that passed away a few months ago pulled a few strings to help it happen so smoothly. She lived in my parents guest house and when she passed, my Mom and Dad wanted to downsize and move into the guest house and rent their main house. Everything has fallen into place so perfectly and we are renting their main house right now until the market gets low enough for us to buy again.

It was actually really sad to say goodbye. This home served us so well and we've made so many great memories in this house. We spent endless hours transforming this dirty gross house into a warm welcoming home. It was actually the very first house we looked at when we were looking for a house and it was an answer to our prayers. It was exactly what we needed and more. When we made the move to my parent's house, so many hands came ready to help. Two of my good friends particularly came and served me all day while I slept. When I woke up from my nap, my good friend Mica was there in my bathroom packing up all quietly and I just cried and cried. I had an overwhelming feeling of gratitude and love. Then the next day they both showed up at our new house and they were putting away all my kitchen boxes! I just about cried again when I saw them. I've made so many life long friends from that neighborhood that have pretty much turned into family, which made it even harder to move, but these are lifelong friends that I will have forever no matter where we are in life or in the world.

Kaydence had the amazing opportunity to attend a Camp called Camp Kesem. It's a camp specifically for kids that have a parent with cancer or had cancer. When I signed up for it summer of last year, I had no idea I even had cancer again, but looking back, I was definitely inspired to sign her up. She was there for an entire week and we weren't allowed to contact her unless it was an emergency. She did amazing and made some great memories. She came home with endless stories. She connected with so many girls that are going through the same things she is. She came home to a room all set up thanks to my friend Mica that gave her this bed and helped paint it for Kaydence. She was so excited to come home to a room with an actual bed since she's been sleeping on the mattress on the floor. Welcome home Kaydence!

I just had my third chemo treatment on Wednesday, June 19th. Each treatment gets worse and worse. This one hit me pretty hard. I just got out of bed today and it's already 1:30pm!  But I have lots of helping hands. My husband is amazing and between him and my Mom, they rub my feet every night to help me get to sleep. Tanner is so helpful and waits hand and foot. He is incredible and I feel very blessed to call him my forever love. Kaydence is a sweetheart and has helped me so much. I am extremely blessed to be her Mother. My Mom has helped with Kaydence and pretty much anything else I need. She's been making me a green drink every morning that has so much fresh greens and fruits. My friends and family have brought be dinner, cleaned for me, massaged me, checked up for me, brought me gifts, etc. My amazing sister surprised me with a chemo therapy bag that is so adorable and packed with everything I could possibly need. My other amazing sister and her hubby surprised us with a purple mattress! I feel like a queen on it. We hadn't bought a new mattress since we were first married about 13 years ago. My brother and sister in law sent us to Hawaii and it was incredible. My sweet sister in law and brother sent me an adorable necklace with my mantra on it "faith over fear". My amazing ward made me a gorgeous quilt and had everyone write notes on it for me. I cried when my friend presented it to me. Kaydence's amazing teacher, Mrs. Mast, surprised me and Kaydence on Mother's Day with an adorable photo print of Kaydence and I when I came to her class last year and did a book reading. The list goes on, but one of my favorites, is so many of you have prayed for me daily at 9:00am. I can't even begin to explain the power I have felt from all the prayers. It's overwhelming and I feel the power of a miracle.

So I have some great news to share! I had a brain scan earlier this week and we got some good hopeful results back!!!!! My tumor is shrinking and dying. It's 25% smaller so far. My doctor said it will continue to shrink so we have another brain scan in 3 months to follow the progress. My heart leaped when I heard those results. I had told so many people before the scan that I felt like the tumor was still there. I have prayed every night that Heavenly Father will continue to bless me with the ability to be in tune with my body to help my health journey. I kept feeling like it was still there, but I still had so much of the peace and comfort that has guided me so far that I thought we will just have to continue treating it. So I was really relieved to find out that it will continue to shrink! Many blessings have come thus far and I know many more will continue to come.

Also, my doctor believes I might have a thyroid imbalance since my fatigue is insanely intense. I got some blood work done and hoping to find some answers soon. I will be meeting with my endocrinologist next week. With this chemo, it's been cool that I didn't lose all my hair! My doctor did tell me before I started this chemo that it's 50/50 chance with this chemo. But I have been losing a ton of hair, so a thyroid imbalance would make sense. That would be nice to get a little more energy and hair back, but either way, I am just very grateful. 

I am going to be removing my ovaries probably in the next month or two. My cancer is hormone driven and I've been on hormone blockers for the past 3 years and it obviously isn't working, so I'm excited to get them out since they are feeding my cancer. I will experience a huge drop in hormones so I am going to try to be prepared and expect some depression and or mood swings, but like my doctor said "Depression is a lot more treatable than death". I am grateful this is even an option. I am willing to do whatever it takes. Then after I complete 3 months of chemo (in about a month) I will be having another scan to see how the cancer in my bone on my upper leg is responding to the chemo. The problem with that spot is that it's inoperable, so we can't just surgically remove it. Then we can either continue the treatment if it's working, or switch to another option. 

Last night I received a blessing from Tanner and my Dad. It was a beautiful blessing of faith and continued healing. It talked about the people on this earth that have been praying for me and it also talked about those on the other side that are praying for me. Tanner got choked up when he talked about those on the other side and I believe my Grandma Rowley has a big part of my healing. That night I prayed asking to know what I need to do right now to be able to receive my blessing of healing. I sat in silence for a few seconds and then immediately the words came to my mind "To be healed, you need to heal your heart". I know exactly what God is talking about and I am making it a goal to have the kind of love that God and Christ have for all of his Children to everyone I come in contact with. I am very excited for my journey to find that Christlike love for everyone no matter what they have done. 

Thanks so much for the love, prayers, thoughts, texts, and many acts of service you have given. It means more than you know. God's hand is in every detail of my life and I am so grateful for Him in my life. God is so good ❤❤❤❤