Let It Go // Deliteful Thoughts

Just another Deliteful Thoughts post to share my thoughts. "Let it Go". I know we've all heard this phrase way too many times in the past two years, but there is so much inspiration in those three words. 

I went through a period of time where I was getting headaches on a regular basis. Nothing too serious and that a couple extra strength Tylenol's couldn't take care of, but it really made want to find out what was causing them. As a sensitive person, I usually am more sensitive to other's feelings, but along with the positive, there comes the negative. I often found myself getting hurt easily and holding in things that not only hurt the person that I'm holding them against, but hurt myself more. Most of the time it was something small and the person doesn't even know, but to me it would really eat at me and hurt me emotionally. I grew up not having very much self esteem or confidence in myself. When I would feel like there was someone that didn't like me or treated me wrongly, it would really hurt. Hurt so much to the point that I would try to figure out without them knowing, what exactly it was about me they didn't like and try to change to become that person they wanted me to be. I battled this over many years and it was only hurting me and holding me back from becoming the person I would like to become rather than the person they wanted me to be. 

As I got older, I became a little more confident, at least on the outside, and kind of forgot that I had a problem holding grudges. In the past few years, in trying to better myself and recognize feelings that may be causing health issues, I've recognized that I need to work on letting go and forgiving. Most of the time when I was unhappy or feeling sick (physically or emotionally), I remembered someone that hurt me. I've had a hard time forgiving people when they don't know my feelings are hurt because I have never been able to express my feelings to them so those feelings get buried alive. There is a book called "Feelings Buried Alive Never Die" that teaches the concept of letting go of grudges and forgiving and how holding in feelings can cause serious health problems. Most of the time it was something so small that it seems would be dumb to express, but I've realized that expressing feelings most of the time helps the healing process. Though, there are times that it's just not going to happen, for example, with someone you don't really have a close relationship with or you don't feel comfortable opening up to. My Mom taught me an amazing trick. When I have a headache, think of who I'm holding a grudge against or something that made me angry recently. It took me some time to try it and really gain a testimony of it, but now every single time I have a headache I can pin point exactly who I had ill feelings against, and I am able to forgive them and my headache goes away with an hour or so with no medication. It is amazing! To do this, I say aloud "I forgive xxx for xxxxx, and I forgive myself for letting it effect me this way".  Even if you don't 100% forgive that person, it really helps to say the words and if it's a serious grudge, it starts the process of forgiveness. 

When I learned how effective this was, I was amazed and it really made sense to me. A lot of the problem was that I was not able to verbally express my feelings, so this way I am able to express my feelings along with verbally forgiving the person and myself. For things that I am holding in against someone close to me, I have learned to express those feelings and it helps the relationship strengthen and mature. How could I expect my Heavenly Father to forgive me if I am holding grudges against others and now allowing myself to forgive them and let go? I have become so much happier in my life and feel more in control of my feelings. I feel free and like huge burdens lifted off my shoulders. 

I encourage all to reflect on your lives and recognize past feelings that are holding you back from enjoying your life and moving on while being able to strengthen the relationships with your loved ones. It's an amazing feeling letting go of all those feelings and starting the healing process. I strongly believe your health will improve significantly and you will be much happier with your life.