2nd Round of Chemo & Mother's Day

Had my second round of chemo last week. It was a rough week, but didn't end up on the hospital this time, so that's improvement! My liver enzymes were elevated, so they lowered one one of the three doses of chemo by 25% just to be safe. Also didn't do a shot that I did last time called Neulasta. It's given day after chemo to help the body start making white blood cells sooner that it would on it's own to prevent chances of infection. Since I didn't tolerate the first treatment of chemo/neulasta well and we aren't sure what caused it, we decided not to do the shot this time around to see if that helps. So far I've felt better than I did the first time, so that may have helped, but it's hard to tell. Just grateful it's not as bad.

I finally got the rest of my chemo treatment plan. I am doing 3 rounds of FEC which is the combo of 3 chemos I'm doing now, so I've got 2 down and 1 more to go. Then I'll switch to a chemo called taxotere which hopefully my body will tolerate much better than the chemo I'm doing now. It also has less serious side effects. The one I'm doing now induce permanent menopause, heart failure and even leukemia (very rare but possible), so it will be good to switch over to the one that doesn't have such serious side effects as this. The last treatment of chemo should be the last week in July, as long as nothing changes, so I'm glad to have a plan in place! After chemo, I'll continue with an infusion (Herceptin) through my port every 3 weeks for a year that helps with a protein that's found in my cancer. It's not as serious as chemo, so my doctor says I should tolerate it well. The side effects are manageable. 

I've also been seeing the rehab therapist weekly since my surgery to help me gain back my range of motion and strength in my arm. I'm just about there. I can finally raise my arm above my head and looks like I will see her one more week and then I'll be good to work on it at home on my own. I may not ever have the range I had before surgery, but I will work on it to get the best results.

A week ago on fast Sunday I decided to shave the remaining amount of hair I had off since it was coming out so quickly. My sister and her boys come over all to help. It was fun to involve the kids. Made it feel less traumatizing for me. I was well enough to attend sacrament meeting afterwards, and I'm so glad I did. I felt a rejuvenation of spirituality that I really needed, but I also witnessed a very sweet and sincere testimony from a little boy that made my heart burst. He was the cutest went up all by himself. At the very end of his sweet testimony he said "and please bless the woman with cancer that she will feel better." I couldn't hold back the tears! They just kept flowing down my face. Even well after the testimony I was still crying. Even though I've lost my hair before, after it was all shaved off, I was really feeling bad about myself and it was just one of those days where I felt nothing looked good on me. Hearing those exact words really touched my heart and put my heart in the right place. I hear "Praying for you", "You are in my prayers" often, but to actually witness a little boy pray for me with such faith and sincerity, was overwhelmingly touching. It also confirmed to me that I really do have so many people praying for me. Sometimes it's hard to tell if people are just saying kind words to bring me comfort or if people really do include me in their daily prayers and this confirmed it for me. I think that's why it hit me so hard. Thanks to the beautiful Mother that is teaching your sweet children the power of prayer. You know who you are and I already have a deep love for you and your children in the short amount of time we've known each other.

Mother's Day was yesterday. It was the best day I've had all week. Had some delicious homemade waffles topped with fresh cut fruit. Also had some very heartwarming tear jerking letters from Tanner and Kaydence, along with some goodies and a massage gift card. Then spent the day visiting my amazing Mom and my other amazing Mom (Tanner's Mom). 

Also got to take a few photos with my sweetheart and I. She amazes me! She pushes me to be strong. She makes me fight harder when I don't feel like fighting. She makes me feel beautiful with or without hair. She has stepped as a mini-Mom in our household. She takes such good care of me from helping me up the stairs, getting me water, rubbing my feet, to singing me to sleep. I love this sweetheart to the moon and back. Words cannot describe the sweet relationship we have. She is my best friend and I am honored to be her Mother. She is going to be a great mother one day and I look forward to witnessing it, even though I don't want her to grow up. She will always be my sweet, sensitive, caring, thoughtful, honest, determined, smart, little baby.